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Only 10 weeks to go! Can we say, holy shit, where does the time go?I'm very busy at work and while full of energy during the day, I totally crash at night. Sleeping is becoming increasingly more challenging but there are still nights when I sleep very well and on the nights its not so grand, I still fall asleep quickly after the many pee breaks and turnovers.I'm also very hungry many times of the day. Baby B is growing like crazy in there from all the food I'm sure. A return to the digestive issues of the first trimester has been unfortunate though....I'm sure its the babe pushing on my intestines but there is no threat of hemorrhoids or constipation here, ack! I'm officially waddling too and the pelvic pressure is on. Baby is still moving a lot as I feel kicks on all sides.DH finally felt the baby move and said for sure he knew it was the baby. Before he couldnt really figure out if it was my breathing or whatever....it was quite magical for him. He has been so wonderful through this whole experience, I cannot wait to see him with our new little one.We're slowing finishing the room. The major renos are done, now its a matter of getting furniture in there and getting the artwork on the walls and things set up. I cannot believe all the baby clothes we already have and honestly, I've only purchased about 5 items myself!! A friend of mine gave me a bunch of her things her son recently grew out of and its mostly sleepers and onsies. Perfect! I also one sling, my brea.st pump, nursing covers and pads, some toys that were mind and some books including books from my own childhood. Also clipping coupons for diapers and wipes...we bought a box of a two different brands and will of course have to give a test drive to see which we like better before doing a major stock-up.My health is still good. At my last check-up, my total weight gain was 3 lbs, blood pressure was good, fundal height was right on and I passed the gestational diabetes test. I see the OB in 2 weeks for the first time. We also have attended some pre-natal classes, had our hospital tour and info session and all my paperwork for admission is finished. February and March have been insanely busy and its not going to let up anytime soon!Here is my 30 week belly pic! Growing and moving everyday!!
With a heavy heart, I am writing tonight to send positive thoughts and prayers to a woman I know through an online community. She is pregnant with her first baby and her husband was murdered last night. I have no words....it's truly a devastating tragedy.Tons and tons of hugs, prayers and love to this friend and her precious "Tadpole."
Thank you very much but NO not every display of emotion is connected to my "hormones." And men...wtf would you know anyway?! Only my DH would get away with it since he really knows me....you're just an ignorant ass.Oh and women...you dont like it very much when people imply you're "PMSing"...so why is it ok to call a pregnant chick "hormonal." There is ZERO difference in how it feels to hear it or what it really means, pregnant or not, other than the fact that pregnant women don't bleed. Furthermore, ignorant men reduce women to PMSing bitches so why commit girl on girl crime by reducing each other to either a PMSing bitch or a hormonal pregnant chick? Not cool.Of all the crap I've heard, which I admit hasn't been much except very recently,....the "you can blame it on hormones," or "hormones" or "she's just a pregnant hormonal chick" really really piss me off.I fully admit hormonal issues around 10 weeks due to anxiety I couldnt seem to control regarding my asshat midwife. I maintain that if the asshat midwife wasnt an asshat, my anxiety wouldnt have been as much of an issue.I'm also entirely aware that hormones are a little crazy during pregnancy. Not every woman feels these effects the same though. Hormones are linked to all kinds of changes in a woman and not every woman goes through it the same. Suffice to say, not all women are affected this way through their emotions.I spoke my mind before getting knocked up thanks....I cried about random sentimental stuff before carrying a baby thanks...I even got angry before pregnancy....These emotions or behaviors are not new thanks...Believe it or not....not every pregnant woman is a hormonally-challenged, uncontrollable, crying, yelling, emotional mess monster for 9 months..Thanks for listening...if I actually told people this who say this crap, other than my close friends who have never said it and totally get why it gets on my nerves, I would hear....Yep you guessed it.."You're just hormonal."
To have been nominated by Ruth for Beautiful Blogger! Thanks Ruth!"The instructions that go along with this award are as follows:* Thank the person who nominated you for this award.* Copy the award and place it in your blog.* Link the person who nominated you for this award.* Tell us 7 interesting things about you.* Nominate 7 bloggers.* Post the links to the 7 bloggers you nominate. "So my interesting things:1.) I am currently reading at least 7 books, some pregnancy related, others are fiction. I cannot read one book at a time, I'm too obsessed, lol! I probably buy at least one book a month. I used to dabble in writing as a kid and teenager. Sometimes I think I would have been an author if I had nurtured that more but there is no way I'm good enough to write something that matters to anybody but me.2.) I am a music nut. I'm highly critical of music, how it sounds, how it is written, and performances. I can listen to any genre, any day of the week. I have played four instruments in my lifetime, 3 of which are in the clarinet family...the Bb clarinet, bass clarinet and contra-alto clarinet. My Bb clarinet was my father's horn, passed down from him to his niece, then to my aunt and then to me. I passed it to a 13 year old cousin (my aunt's daughter) who didnt like it so I have it back now. It's approximately 40 years old and I'm going to permanently mount it very soon. I played the Bb until grade 9 when I switched to bass clarinet for concert bands. I played the Bb in marching band in university. The contra-alto is my favorite because its rarely played, I was able to play it for solos in pieces so I stood out a bit as the only contra-alto player, it is the second largest clarinet and when I first played it in 8th grade, I needed to stack two chairs to reach the mouthpiece. 3.) My DH and I have known each other since 2003 when we met online on a random messageboard. We met in 2005 in person. From 2005 until our wedding in October 2007, we spent various stretches of time together every few months and the total number of days we spent in person before getting married was 90 days!4.) I have a recurring nightmare of gigantic thumbtacks that chase me in a large white, doorless, windowless room. I've had this nightmare since the age of 5. I have no idea what it symbolizes but I'm sure at different times in my life, it has held different meaning. It is very strange.5.) I am intensely interested in the weather. My father was a farm boy and also obsessed with the weather and passed this on to me. I dont watch the weather channel nearly as much as him but when the skies are funky not only in look but smell...I go on high alert.6.) I have lived through a flood that destroyed the lower half of our home when I was 15 years old. This natural disaster has shaped me more than any other event in my life. Like any trauma, I can recall incredibly minor things about the time period in great detail. I do not like spring anymore because when the snow melts, I can smell it mixed with sand which reminds me of the sandbags that failed to keep the water out of the town. Melting snow creates minor anxiety that it could flood again. I will never own a property near a body of water, especially a river. However, I love water and enjoy water sports, fishing and the like; I just respect it a great deal. 7.) I have tried dabbling in photography in the last couple of years but I'm not serious enough about it to get an expensive camera and really go to town on it. But I do find some beautiful shots especially when traveling or out in nature. I think it brings me closer to God, something I've also struggled with for several years now.I nominate:A.J.EllaApple PieAshAimless ThoughtsKassE
Holy cow, 6 months already! Time has flown by, it really has!
To recap the month, not much has changed. Still feeling good. At my last appt, I've gained back those 2 lbs lost. So only a 2lb gain total at that point. All other vitals were good. Cant complain really.
Its hard to walk around with all this ice and snow. I'm a slow mover these days, I really dont want to fall. I tire much easier than before too. My feet and ankles get swollen at night but clears up during the day. My back and hips get quite sore in bed but still nothing intolerable. Dh gives me back and foot rubs every night.
I imagine I'll be sleeping in the recliner towards the end. Speaking of the recliner, its brand new! We used our Christmas money on it and it will go in the nursery to start with and then eventually downstairs in our rec room. Its a nice cushy recliner/rocker.
The baby is moving a ton but still can not get DH to feel at the right time. The baby will be going nuts and I'll go sit by DH and it'll stop. Or we'll be in bed and I'll tell him to feel for it and it'll stop. Total drama queen!!
We started on the baby's room. Its quite the project but we have lots of time yet to get it done.
Here is my 24 week pic! I actually look PG and not like I ate a big plate of cheeseburgers, haha! The Habs shirt is from DH's aunt. It totally doesnt fit at all, it wouldnt even fit before getting PG but she was sweet enough to buy it so I figured I had to wear for at least one pic. DH's family are huge Montreal Canadiens fans...the baby already has TWO cruiser sets with the Habs...one in 6-9 month and the other in 18 month, haha!
Disclaimer:I respect and understand that women from all walks of life will view this very differently from me and that's just fine. Each of us goes through this differently and feels different about the topic. These are only my thoughts and opinions on the subject and believe me when I say I've spent a LOT of time pondering this before getting pregnant and throughout my pregnancy. In fact, my header and one of the reasons I started this blog points out that body image is a topic I will talk about multiple times.I am not a small girl.I'm also not a big girl.I would say I'm an average to slightly above average woman. Considering the average woman is a size 12-14, my size 16 is not much bigger and I carry my weight pretty well. People are surprised when I have revealed my previous pre-pregnancy weight at 230 lbs. I'm pear shaped. I have a bigger bottom, thicker legs, and wide hips. I'm built very much like my Bohemian great-grandmother. I have had a pot belly since I was 10. I have always hated it, and I especially hate the phrase "pot belly" ever since my uncle pointed mine out to me at the age of 10. My brea.sts before getting PG were not exactly proportionate to my lower body though they were a C cup. Since the age of 20, I've steadily gained weight and I'm definitely not satisfied with it at all. So while I recognize these many things about my body, its shape and weight, I'm not ok with it. I have gotten more self-conscious about it over the years and less confident over all. Before getting pregnant, I thought a great deal about gaining even more weight during pregnancy. I couldn't imagine adding more weight to this frame and it really frightened me to think what it would be like after to try to get it off since I haven't been good at getting it off before. Losing weight before pregnancy also seemed rather pointless since I would just be putting it back on but I recognized that for the health of me and my baby it would be worth it to at least try to get some of it off. I did not, though I felt healthier than in the past, and I really got anxious about it when we were trying to conceive. Since getting pregnant, I have felt a great deal of peace about my body. Not only its appearance but also how it works and what it is doing to nourish this little being that has taken up residence for the next few months. Since getting pregnant, I've gained 2 lbs. My mother advised me that she only gained 15 lbs with me and she was at a normal weight when pregnant with me. Therefore, I dont think I'll gain much weight over the course of this but I do hope to stay within a 20lb gain. Considering I only have 4 months to go, I might be able to do it. Not for my looks but for my health. I'm not concerned about the number but more about high blood pressure, GD and a healthy labor and delivery.This all said....It bothers me a great deal when I hear pregnant women talk about "getting fat" when pregnant. In my head, if you were a normal or even slightly overweight before getting PG, then you dont really know what it is like to be a fat girl. Not even a slight clue at all. Until you've been considered a fat girl by all 'normal' standards not just in clothing size and media messages but BMI, weight, and the like....you're not a fat girl. You may not be happy with your extra 10 or 20 lbs and thats ok, but until you reach a certain point, you're likely not a fat girl.Gaining weight for pregnancy is normal. Its supposed to happen, even if we do our best to fight it or try to manage it. Pregnancy is not a free pass to eat whatever you want because that isnt good for you or the baby. But you're not getting fat. I can't get behind agreeing or sympathizing with a woman who says she's getting fat during pregnancy. I can get behind feeling undesirable, feeling cumbersome and clumsy, or feeling a little crazy about what is changing and a bit worried about the unknown long-term effects on shape after pregnancy. I can get behind wanting to get the baby weight off so you can be comfortable in your body again. I can even get behind feeling upset about the weight post-baby and worrying about how to get it off because no woman really wants to be a fat woman.
But calling oneself fat during pregnancy? Nope sorry...cant do it. The reason is I am a fat girl and gaining weight during pregnancy is NOT the same as being fat. In my mind, it can never be equal. I don't understand it at all. I just want to shake these women and tell them, you're a doing a beautiful thing here and you're a beautiful freaking goddess. You are blessed to even be able to get pregnant and carry this child...some women struggle with fertility or never get the opportunity to become a mother through biological means. What your body is doing for you and your child is unbelievable and should be respected. I think because I am so amazed at what my body is doing I cant view it as fat. I was fat before but not now. When I am no longer pregnant and at my pre-pregnancy weight, I will be fat again. And then I'll have to work on losing the weight for my health and my future. Bottom line is that I recognize I will never be a skinny girl but I can certainly be a healthier woman too. We have such a distorted viewpoint of healthy bodies anyway and the messages we get are so ridiculous.I hope that this peace and amazement with my body now will carry over when I'm no longer pregnant. This period of time has done wonders for my body image and self-esteem that I hope to reap the benefits of these positive feelings to stay motivated to care for this vessel and get healthier for me and my children. I hope that this has helped me to leave behind those distortions and unhealthy messages and move into a great acceptance of who I am and that I'm not going to keep defining myself as a fat girl.
View from the door
Bookshelf waiting for more books and toys. A blue rocker will be to the left of the shelf.
Quilt rack. The top blanket was made for this baby by my grandmother. The rest were made for me when I was a baby 27 years ago by my great-aunt, grandma and great-grandma. The two yellow blankets were my crib set made by my grandma. The very bottom one was made by my great-grandma and I intend to have our newborn pics taken with that particular blanket.
